Kawan-kawan 5 Azam 2008,
Apa khabar semua?
Malam-malam macam ni, aku bosan, aku buang masa, tiba2 terdetik, untuk aku jenguk blog ni, tmpat aku selalu tgk, lama dulu, tempat aku mengintai kawan, tengok kegembiraan kawan,
aku nampak banyak sangat gambar2 lama kita semua, dan bila ternampak gambar aku, aku menangis. aku menangis sangat2.
i dont even know who that (used to be me) is already. aku hilang, aku hilang jauh sangat. banyak sangat perubahan yang telah berlaku, because i let life get the best of me.
"Sometimes its good to go to back to a place that never change, to see how much you've changed".
Most of you xdgr lagi pasal aku, tapi ada seorang je nampak aku selalu, iaitu haidar, aku sama U dgn dia. Yes, korg xdgr pasal aku, aku bawak diri, aku malu, aku sedih, semua ada, lepas aku fail IB Diploma kat KMS. first thought lepas aku fail, aku nak masuk tentera, and then apply for something else. but my parents and brother didnt let me.
so aku sambung blaja kat UIA. aku da lain, sangat lain, aku xtau. aku da x bgaul sangat, aku da xblaja, aku da x cemerlang like i used to be. aku xtau kenapa, aku langsung hilang semangat.
dulu kat KMS, i was famous, then i screwed up. xmalu untuk aku mengaku, i screwed up real bad, like Jenny in the movie "Forrest Gum".
Budu da kawen, Musang da kawen, Nadia da ada anak, aku xsempat pg satu pun majlis korang, if u guys r reading, im so sorry. i truly am. banyak sangat perubahan yang kita da lalui. aku sempat jumpe nadia dan suami 2 kali di Kuantan. kalau boleh, ye, aku mmg nak patah balik, zaman dulu.
Well, i dont know for sure korg baca x, but I dont know, it doesnt matter at this point. semua post2 aku pasal bende bodoh sebelum ni, dan aku malu,
aku masih igt lagi, waktu aku berumur seusia dgn gamba2 aku dalam blog ni, i had no worries, i thought i got it all, but within a blink of an eye, i lost everything.
many of u have changed, to the better, well congrats, and many have found love, create a family, a job, well, 8 years does change a lot of things doesnt it?
aku x tau for sure knapa aku tulis, rindu ada, sedih ada, entahla.
Of course, aku pun trgn nak ada reunion, kat mana2 aja, satu kelas kita, smua 30 org (or 35, i forgot) but to be honest, i dont think it will happen, Everything changes, so do us.
aku x igt bila last aku pergi samura, setahun ke dua tahun lepas, da x byk benda sama pun. byk berubah wajah, tapi, aku ttp igt kat mana kita, kat mana aku selalu berbual, menangis, do crime, who was my enemy, who was my crush, who broke my heart, whose heart i broke, who helped me, everything la masa aku pg jenguk samura hari 2.
ternampak mira hanun post pasal mara, haidar post pasal mara dalam blog ni, aku terasa interview dulu macam baru je berlaku. kebelakang ni, (tahun ni n lepas, 2015 n 2014) aku byk ulang alik kl. tapi aku x trgt sikit pun pasal mara. i tried so hard to forget, and yup, i succeeded.
i dont want to sound harsh, tapi, kadang2 masa kita berkawan, "hey dude, friends forever man, i wont forget u, i will not". haha. we were too young to realise, that there are so much more things in life, so much bigger fishes to fry, that eventually (most of us, termasuk aku) we forget those things jugak.
aku menangis masa tinggalkan SAMURA. sebab pakcik n makcik aku ambik awal, aku mintak diorg ambik lambat so dapat spend time dgn kawan2. parents aku x dpt amek, sbb diorg pg haji waktu 2. dalam hati aku, aku kata, aku x kan lupa, tapi lupa jugak.
one year after that, aku pg muar, lpak ngan kepet, ngan geng2 high school muar dia, but didnt think much on SAMURA. haha. what a hypocrite of me.
this post pon, masa baca (if we r gonna read), maybe some of us will go "aww thats right, i feel u, i miss us" but eventually we'll forget. there's a reason why the word memories/kenangan diciptakan. its for us.
i miss us,
sincerely,
Syed Mohamed AKA stompel
